Children and Us. And Memories.

Previously posted on my Facebook page. Or written years ago, unedited/not updated.

THERE was a time when mom and dad used to admonish us children for watching too much TV. Junk, they said. I may have done the same to my kids when they were little but not as strict as my dad was. But then these days in the Age of the Internet by way of Social Media, I'd rather motivate teen-age and 20something youths to watch TV series like “Homeland,” “The Americans,” “Hell on Wheels,” and “The Newsroom” than spend time on Facebook trapped in those silly political so-called discussion. 

       Most people tend to simply shoot one-line blurbs that diss or praise without the “why.” At least, the shows that I mentioned offer compelling arguments and well-formulated/researched information very significant in discussion and dialogue, especially in educating the young. 

       I grew up and was trained as a journalist. Facts. Double/triple-checked facts. We had to fight for those facts. Not even my dad could sway me with sermonized ramblings about stuff. I will not debate him but I had to investigate further. Facebook election-related hubbub is replete with whimpers and echoes that may seem harmless. But due to the amount of false information in the guise of funny memes and “websites of folly” plus exchanges of barbs that stream in and out of the Homepage, these become dangerous. 

       I am not siding with any political candidate or preaching a Church creed or something. I just have to admit that many times I am moved to ask, “Really? Tell me, send me links and data and stuff to support your allegation.” None. The person in question either scoots out or continues to coax me to a sidewalk grubble. That's the time that I fall in a sewer of stupid debate over nothing.

       Since high school, I've always loved sociopolitical, economic and cultural discussions, especially from a historical and scientific point of view. My college years were backstopped by endless soirees and convergences where most of what we talked about were stuff around, mostly political. And I always got good words, new knowledge. When I shared something that needs to be corrected, I wasn't called a “moron” or “a dick.” Those around me offered additional information. That was the way it was before.

       These days, I don't know. I really want to know more about people. But I'd like to listen to someone who's got something to say in 15 paragraphs than someone who's got something to spit out in 4 words. Maybe that's the problem—we've lost the patience to listen and the ability to speak. 😏😒🤨

Aloneness is an understatement. And other thoughts.

Previously posted on my Facebook page. Or written years ago, unedited/not updated.

MY immediate family are oceans away. Yet I never really felt loneliness the way I hear it from some friends, including those who are with loved ones. But I do feel sadness sometimes. Of course, I do. But living in this mountain idyll for almost eight years now has blessed me with sublime quiet and warm intimacy—and familial love from my friend Cindyrella—that negates whatever that may be defined as "loneliness." Life evolves. I enjoy my blessings. I write stuff that I know makes people feel better somehow. My sappy poems could still win a smile or two, albeit online. Well, that's all the little hero that I could ever be. I am happy being that kind of pasckie. Meantime, Georgia The Babedawg and Cyd The Koolcat are such transcendent gifts of presence. 🌬💨🥹

ALL THOSE YEARS AGO. I feel that at age 55, a relentless five decades of life that not many of my current friends have witnessed in me, I already experienced most of what life has to offer. I was a totally different person when I was in my 20s to early 40s. But although I experienced a lot more than an average 80 year old has, I didn't do the "wild" stuff. I mean, I've never experimented on drugs or engaged in any form of casual sex or never violated the law--apart from my rabid activism when I was in my 20s to late 30s which I call, civil disobedience. I've never been (legally/lawfully) charged with anything or ticketed for whatever--despite a very active life out there in communities in so many big cities and small towns in two continents. 

       Among many other adventures and misadventures--I have been to places that a few will dare tread, covered events that journalists refer to as "hot spots," raised kids at a very harsh time, been into life and death situation twice, "ran between the rain and bullets" as a traveler, backpacked like the road was my home, traveled my worst road trip ever beyond physical danger (which happened recently), and been to a most difficult relationship. 

       My emotional wear and tear supersedes my physical exhaustion--yet the spiritual growth that I derive from all these negates all the mental tiredness. But although you and I might say, we also experienced a most ideal relationship sometime years ago, till we wasted it so foolishly--that doesn't mean we can't experience another one. A lot better. There are a few thousand more miles left to negotiate. After all these crazy years, I haven't been healthier since my surgery in New York City in 2000. No vitamins, no food paranoia, no viagra--yet I can still sweat it playing basketball or doing yard work. No regular trips to the doctor for checkups, no pills, no let up with steamed white rice. I drink yet I know when to quit (gone down to two beers or two shots of tequila or vodka), no debts, no court dates--but sigh (!) still no wife and no girlfriend.

       Meantime, in life, we should accept in humility and surrender where we faltered and failed in those attempts and so we should know how to succeed the next time. They say save the best for last. Absolutely! As for me, for sure, next year will be closer to what I was. Just older and wiser. But a different life. I still got time to engage some entrepreneurs to a business hook-up in an Asia/US route, write more books and read them in cafes and universities, brainstorm a movie or two with my son, write more songs with my former band, fundtraise for typhoon victims, deliberate political upheavals and economic trends locally and globally with a think tank, play pickup basketball with my four brothers and nephews, visit France and Italy and Greece and the rest of the 7,641 islands in the Philippines that I haven't set foot on, and make love from dusk till dawn (if there's another chance, that is). 

       Therefore, the journey isn't over yet though. It just took a different route leading to the ultimate destination. On layovers, there will be chilled raw oysters and mango mojitos on the seaside and lots of laughter by a roadside cantina. 🌬💨🥹

About Dogs and Cats and their Buddies.

Previously posted on my Facebook Page. 

SOME 70 percent of today’s children spend at least 3 to 5 hours on devices every day. Which is a modest estimate, of course. So much of how children interact with each other, do their homework and entertain themselves has become more digital. Many even identify now with indoor cats. When offline, children now meow to tell mom they want dinner. Other children who ID as feral cats are “shamed” online as populists, evangelicals, or Chinese. 👧📱🧒

ARE bears really dangerous to humans? Bear behavior is unpredictable. Friendly or hostile. Each bear and each experience is unique. Yet most bear encounters end without injury. Meanwhile, there have been reports of ahimsa cats who are negotiating a truce with bears. Ahimsa cats are good at diplomacy. They can also teach bears how to google stuff or open a YouTube account so they can also watch fish videos. That’d distract bears from eating interpolating hoomans. 🐻🦊🐼

CHINESE officials have said they do not want war with America. China simply wants to do business. But you may ask, why are they buying all the chopsticks and woks in the U.S.? Nope. Those koolcats are Japanese merchants from Aoshima. Fizz and Ching also descended from that Japanese cat island, but they are mixed. The Wiz and The Zing’s ancestry are traced to Icelandic Viking Freydis Eiriksdottir and a greatgrandson of Samurai lord Minamoto no Yoshitsune. Hai! 🐱🥢👲

CHEAT, verb. Cheating, gerund or present participle. Act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage, especially in a game or examination. Now, please don’t give me the correct definition, woke translation, Right-wing elaboration, or Left-wing explanation. Cheat, cheating. Done. 🤨🧐😝

DOGS can learn a lot of words in the English language or any other language that they're raised with. They can also pick up on our tones and distinguish between familiar and unfamiliar languages. Hence, they can also be taught how to write. Cyd then knew and now Fizz knows. Fizz also writes/meows in French, Says she: “Oui, les chiens peuvent apprendre à écrire.” Oui! 🐱👩‍🏫🐱

WHAT does “the world revolves around you” mean? To think you are extremely important; showing arrogance and conceit. But then, in case you’ve been isolated or indoors a lot even before the pandemic, and you spend 99.9 percent of your days in your bedroom, that’d mean your world is your room. Surely, your cats get offended by your arrogance and conceit. That is why they bitchlap you all the time. Now you know. 😁😒😾

RESEARCH shows dogs can help to reduce stress, anxiety and depression on a chemical level. There's ample studies highlighting the efficacy of trained service dogs, particularly those who are bred to have a calming temperament. So in case you are having “long Covid,” start sitting with your dog an hour a day. Your dog can prescribe you better treats to eat and lead you to the best spots in the yard to sniff-sniff. Good for your mental health, I guess. 🥹😭🐕

CATS have been shown to respond very positively to cat-specific music. Cat-specific music is mostly classical music, which also mimic/s sounds like purring. Cats tend to enjoy cat-specific music much more than music made for humans. Ching enjoys Erik Satie’s “Gymnopedie #1” and Franz Schubert’s “Schwanengsang D. 957” as background to fish and bird videos. Fizz though doesn’t dig the word “cat-specific.” She says it is an “incorrect” word. 😼🎼😽

THE Philippines is the country that takes the most selfies. Top selfie-madness people live in Makati City and Pasig, urban areas in Manila, with a population of around 500,000, who take around 258 selfies per 100,000. So you know why I have 5,000+ selfies stored on my FB. My nieces CD, Denise, Chien, and Chynna have 7k each; my nephew Rael Kobe has 1 million+. But the selfie winner in the family is my youngest bro Alvaro, with 3 million selfies, excluding 4 million videos, LOL! 📱📲🇵🇭

DOGS can use surprisingly complex tricks to deceive humans. Dogs aren't as honest and obedient as they might like to have us think. Especially if your dog lives with a cat. Cats teach dogs so many tricks. Such as the Lee Strassberg Method Acting. Almost all domesticated cats went to that school in New York. Feral cats got their lessons from shinobi koolcats in Aoshima cat island in Japan. These smart vagabond koolcats snuck in American merchant ships to go elsewhere, such as in Asheville. 🐕😹🐕‍🦺

Love in Time.

Previously posted on my Facebook page. Or written years ago, unedited/not updated.

AS you get older and look back at all those broken valentines, shattered relationships, mistakes and mishaps—you tend to ponder deeper and learn to accept in humility that you also did commit faults and let your flaws dictate your decisions. Wrongdoings aren't confined to one person. So you tell yourself, when you meet someone who lets love blossom in you again, this is going to be better because you have learned from the past.

You know what you should change in you, modify and learn more to help a relationship finally find a degree of realizable success. You know the current-you is the best from all that you were. Now you are committed, you have time, you have a love that is present and alive. You are not perfect but you know you are more than alright.

       Yet the relationship still fails. As you reel from the splinters of your bleeding heart, you take in all the words that all point at how awful and evil you are. But are you really that bad? Maybe it is not her/him and it is not you, per se. It is the “wrongness” of a relationship attempt that wasn't working. You feel the love but it finds a room or space that finds it hard to evolve into a positive light. A relationship that couldn't pursue beauty and wisdom. It's all anger. You are dragged out to thorny brush in the woods or the cold darkness of your shell. The demons in you that you believed have left are threatening to come alive again. You start beating yourself up.

       So leave and let go. You don't need to punish yourself just because you are told you are the worst human being there is. You are not. You just haven't found the apt relationship that you deserve. And that holds true with your ex. Mere fact that you first fell in love together meant you both saw the goodness in each other's hearts—until some harsh realities and uncompromising truths got in the way. Just move on and always open your heart no matter how broken it could be. There will always be a warm hand and a loving heart that will meld and mend and sail with yours. Your chance at joy is not yet over. You haven't failed. 

       Meantime, don't forget to live good, love good, eat only good food. And dance. It's summer,  you know. 🍎🥗🍊

Dating Her, Knowing Him.

Previously posted on my Facebook page. Or written years ago, unedited/not updated.

I AM probably the weird one here. Or has life changed? How easy it is to gather (or “friend”) people on Facebook yet it equals the difficulty of “friending” someone out there. When we ask another (opposite sex) to meet over coffee or beer or to hang out and play pool or walk dogs in Carrier Park, would that qualify as a “date”? Or are you sending signals that say, “I'd like to date you”? How'd you “date” someone whose personality/character are mostly typed in/posted online? It doesn't make sense to me. 

       Yet you may find someone in here who could vibe with your aura or probably share common threads on things—the “Matrix” trilogy, seafood paella, glass sculpture, vinyl records, Murakami, democratic socialism, Goodwill shopping, familial wisdom  etcetera. Wouldn't you wanna meet that person beyond the internet? Just meet. You don't need to get a new haircut or gear up your Beckham abs. 

       We grow and evolve into better individuals via interaction with humanity and the world, out there. What we get on the internet are second/third hand data. It's like knowing David Bowie and Prince through their music only. Do you know that they could be as odd as the next-door dude who winks at you every other Thursday as you gas up on Merrimon Ave? Or maybe they're not that odd. It would be awesome to align wavelengths with someone that you actually interacted with beyond “likes” and emojis. Maybe someone that you shared a sweet concert at The Orange Peel or walked with along Beaver Lake talking about your respective kids or went with to Caleb Beissert's open mic? Something deeper might ensue or develop, why not? 

       But how do we know people before we begin imagining under starry, starry nights or scaring ourselves in the dark confines our room fearing that this dude could be Jason Voorhees-incarnate? Post the negative stuff that converges in your dark cloud of paranoid imaginings, expect 55 likes in one minute! You see, we may post and share all the wonderful confections of our life and rant how brilliant we see society and governance on social media—but until we see eye to eye, spend real time together (other than nervous candlelit Bonefish Grill dinners or Thirsty Monk beers) beyond the constraints of “Ten Dating Rules,” we will never know. 

       Sadly, all those red flag fears and preconceptions will gather while we ruminate in front of our laptop what should be and what shouldn't be. Meet and hang. If you spend moments on a weekly basis, or even several times a week, better. Plan it out, talk. That's how we know people—future friends or possible sweethearts. 👩‍🦰💘👨‍🦰